The viva-vocevich theory

My viva was postponed by a day due to reason unknown and so it was today. It is always a fun sight watching the teacher's minions studying like it was the last day of the earth and studying would keep them alive in the post apocalyptic world. As usual, i hadn't studied a thing. But this time, i had three reasons not to study.
First; I had attained Zenlightenment and finally understood that these small things aren't going to matter in the bigger picture.
Second; I somehow have this weird feeling of being the Bernard Madoff of viva-vocas. Maybe not with so much glamor or a lifetime in prison, but sure as hell the audacity of not studying shit and being able to score top notch :D
And finally, i have a scientific theory to support my claim that he was going to ask me some very VERY simple questions
I'm calling it THE VIVA-VOCEVICH THEORY. Its copyright so don't even try.
It goes like so:
Viva examinations are a simple one on one with an external examiner you don't know. So the first point being that if you are well dressed and respect his authority, he's gonna shower you with marks. Also, the complexity of the questions depends on the number of students he has to question.
Case 1 (Yesterday; when he did not show up):
The batch consisted of 30 odd people and he was supposed to arrive at 9 and leave by 3 which, in theory gives him a lot of time to screw students. However, after 10 or 12 odd students, he eases up mainly because he gets bored.
So the easiness of the questions can be given by a graph of a bell curve

The first roll no. (unfortunately me) was going to get screwed up so as to set an example to the others that the external is unnerving and unsparing. The last roll no. was also screwed because the examiner knows that he can have no more fun torturing kids for the day and he would take all the frustration on the last kid.
The middle ones had it easy; the examiner would be bored, hungry and just wanting to go home due to the stupid answers given by their predecessors.

Case 2 (Today, when the viva DID happen):
It was supposed to start at 9 and he came nicely at 1:30, promptly went for lunch and then finally sat in the examination room at 2.
Now, he had to take the viva of 65 students by 3:45, hence a time constraint caused a change in his examination pattern. The graph of the question complexity suddenly becomes an exponential curve.

The last ones get screwed up in this case also because, well, the examiner just wants to have some fun.
So according to my own theory, i should've gotten the easiest question today. SO WHY STUDY!!!
Now isn't this theory awesome :P

p.s. It worked for me. Try it sometime...

p.p.s. The writer claims no responsibility in case of a screwed up test because you followed his advice