2 1/2

This is just a random observation. Nontheless it is oh-so-powerful.I've made a new theory. The 2 1/2 theory. It goes like so.

2 1/2 gulps = 1 pint of beer

2 1/2 pints = 1 bottle of beer

2 1/2 bottles = 1 pitcher

2 1/2 pitchers = 1 tower

2 1/2 towers = 1 drunk ass party

:P

p.s. I am again posting from the chamber of xaolin. After all, i get such birdbrained thoughts only there.

I've Been Thinking...

My blogging has faced a slump. Its hit a dry spell. Its been tapped out. I can't come up with more metaphors to say that my writing is dead. At least for the last 3 days, going from a post a day to zilch. I am unable to write or come up with anything...

I visited this blog. To tell the truth, i was completely intimidated by the writing. He is writing what I want to! That too 4 months ahead of me :(

I'm in admiration of the blog but COME ON!! Let me also get some credit for my writing..

Will think of innovative posts to beat the bugger.

Till then, may the power of blogger keep you hooked.

Xaolin Showdown

The chambers of xaolin are sacred. The have been used for ages by the chinese for traning their warriors. The chambers, a not-so-well-guarded secret, train the mortals all the qualities necessary to be a warrior including physical, mental and emotional training.
There are originally 32 chambers of xaolin. To stop you from wondering where i am heading with this post, i'll spill it out. Today i found the 33rd chamber.
Quietly nestled on the eight floor of our college, it poses itself as an internet room for the moronic mortals. When an ordinary man tries to connect on the internet, the warrior learns a new quality. That of mind numbing PATIENCE!!!
It takes 12 freakin minutes to open a site like blogger. And while you wait it doesn't even play a HOLD ringtone. *grrr*
The 33rd chamber of xaolin is soon to be detroyed by an impatient warrior, lets call him Me-gonna-break-lab. (After thorough research, i found such a name actually exists :P)...
So use the 33rd chamber while you still can :D
May the spirit of xaolin be with you

P.S. If you are wondering why I'm complaining about the same lab from which I'm posting...i love the rush of being a hypocrite :P

Mock Interviews

We have this compulsory subject called PCT (presentation and communication techniques) in our third semester in which we have mock interviews for term work. My mock interviews happened a few days back but relating it to kamya revived the mockery that it actually was.
The interview is divided into two parts, being the interviewer and the interviewee. This week i was the former. I remember some of the questions i asked to my petrified classmate and the hilarious replies that i got.

Me: Where do you see yourself in five years?
Her: Most probably doing research.
M: So you are using this job only as a platform for a better resume.
H: Yes. :P
(Thank god it wasn't an actual interview)

M: Why have you chosen our company for this job?
H: It was the only one with a job advertisement in the paper
(At this point i just lost hope)

M: So this is your last option?
H: Actually, i'm still undecided whether i want a job or i want to do research. It all depends on my M.S. Application
(She is so screwed!!)

M: Ok. Moving on... The post you have applied for, it requires some physical strength. Do you think that this will be an obstacle?
H: I think you should hire SOME subordinates to do the physical labour.
(This one was just too good)

Another interview which was just the icing on the cake
Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
Interviewee: Sir, In your chair
:S

After this i really badly want to see their actual interviews. Thats just going to be gravy :P.
Till then, i hope more and more of these interviews keep happening just for some sadistic pleasure.

P.S. My interview is next week. Let's see how badly I get screwed up. :|

Rangeen Panda

I'm sure we have all seen the new GEMS ad about the colorful pandas. And i'm sure all of you concur when i say "What the F is this??".
I think the stupidity of advertisement has touched new realms with this ad. Actually, the mindless ads started with BINGO chips. But come on...those ads were hilarious. This one is just retarded. I mean WHAT IS UP WITH YOU AD PEOPLE!! The voice-over supposedly Navjyot Singh Siddhu, who right now has a career direction as focused as a damaged GPS, tells stuff that may embarrass his seven generations to come. And the pandas...well what can i say...sometimes you just gotta laugh at those poor bastards. But my point stands that new ads are just asinine.

So the next time you see an ad with seventeen blind rats dancing near this guy reading some book printed on a lion's back, its most probably an ad for a cellphone :P

Periodic Tests

My second periodic tests have started. A long three day ordeal not any easier than a triathlon has finally reared its ugly head on me. After long days and even longer nights working my ass off, when i sit for my paper, a realization hits me like an icy gust of wind.

I Don't Know Bull!!

God save me...

My cold shower

I was just in the shower today and i realized something. After the regular double application of shampoo i noticed something. Something so horrific just the revival of it sends jitters down me. Looking at the floor, eyes widened, "Im Going Bald!!!".
With more than a few strands of hair being washed away by water with carelessness i realized the gravity of the situation...

What subsequently followed were what you can say 'The five stages of grief'.
Anger: "Oh Shit!"
Denial: "I just had a haircut the day before. The cut hair is just resurfacing."
Bargaining: "Maybe if i pray to the egyptian deity of testosterone my hair might grow back."
Depression: "Which chick with a perfect head of hair going to go out with a bald guy!", but then again i heard that Ghandiji, with all due respect, was a babe magnet.
and finally
Acceptance: "Oh Shit!"

"Perseverance and some hair care will re fertilize your partly barren head" said my Jedi master. So off i go to buy some VERY expensive hair care products and maybe some hair moose (for extra sensitive hair).

Damn my genes!

The Grand Ferrero

Ever thought about the word 'Perfect'?? A simple 3 syllabled word doling out multiple compliments simultaneously. Well i looked it up but any synonym was dismal. But be not dejected. Even if no verbal composition can live up to the word 'Perfect', i found something that can.

At this point, you would be expecting a life changing insight into the real purpose of life, but all I'm talking about are chocolate covered nut balls...

Ferrero rochers, a perfect concoction of perfect taste, perfect size, perfect color, perfect texture....Perfect.

These masterpieces, 15 bucks a piece, are somewhat of a marvel. Consuming it elevates you beyond the ordinary. Makes you fell like...well i'll say it...a God. Each chocolate covered punus dulcis (almonds for the lay man) tastes just the right amount of sweet. Its not overwhelming like a mortal 'Dairy Milk' or a 'MARS bar' but also not too subtle like a 'Coco crunch'. Even the crunchiness isn't too much ('Munch') or too little ('Maltese'). Like the Baby Bear's bed, it is JUST RIGHT.

With a ferrero rocher in my mouth, I salute this chef-d'œuvre in all its grandeur. Let it always feel like heaven...

Coldplay

Acoustic music is somehow boring, the lyrics mundane and the sound just cold.

Coldplay is different. For once, an acoustic band has me hooked to its music in a way none other could. I can listen to its music in every mood and still feel the jitters i felt the first time i heard those songs. I wonder what is about its music that i can link to so well. What gets to me?

"Look at the stars. Look how they shine for You..." - Yellow.

Coldplay has music that is not what you can call conventional. I mean look at Life In Technicolor II or Lovers in Japan. It is simplistic but somehow elevates your mood. The lyrics are something anyone can relate to. I mean, the first time i heard Til kingdom come i thought they were singing it specially for me. That feeling i don't find with any other band. Even Green Day, my close second in band ranking, is no comparison in its words.

The first time i heard coldplay (not live) was at Totos about 2 years back. Yellow playing on the speakers, i fell in love with it. Now, 190 coldplay songs later, i am still in love with it. And with every one of those 190 songs.

This is just an ode to my favorite band, who i hope will come to India and fulfill my undying wish of watching them play Live.

"Its true,

look how they shine for you

look how they shine for you

Its true look how they shine for you

look how they shine for you"

- Yellow

Pilot 101

Every so often people are hit with an overwhelming urge to write. Their thoughts, stories and memories clearly formed in their mind. But the incohesive feature of words leaves them unable to substantiate anything. Epiphany struck and i realized i am IN such a feeling. Today i decided to let that feeling pass and verbalize some of my thoughts, however menial and lacking any order or sense, and begin my blogging.

So i begin with a chaotic and poorly formed prologue. Hope the following posts are enjoyable and readable..